Sabbatical Day 3 Jan 2

Today I arose early, after not sleeping well, to do the final things needed for our departure from the wet cold south, and into the frozen, frigid, and snow covered north. I remember now why I prayed and asked God to let me move south, the cold is something that is hard to take. Made chex mix for the ride, packed a cooler with water, packed a few items for the trip, fueled the car headed north, sent a few emails and submitted the statistical report. As i stated in an earlier post I was not sure I was really looking forward to this time. Today as I traveled with son, he doing the driving and we spent some time discussing issues of the past few months, how we each were doing currently and what the future looks like. Neither of us can agree what the future holds, but we know how we handle things today determine some things in the future. As i watched some netflix on my phone and he listening to the tunes on my ipod nano, (he was driving), I began to contemplate and felt the holy spirit began to speak. I really have a hard time letting down my guard and allow very few to know me. Part of this is out of self preservation, and part is that some may think I am totally bonkers. But today as I looked out upon the dark brown landscape, I felt there is something I need to share. Since there are not many who read this blog, very few will know this, so here goes. I have for the last several years struggled with bouts and sometimes deep pits of depression. There are days I can barely function, and there are days when I have energy to do everything and more. This issue I struggle with has left me at times wondering about my own sanity, and times I feel very angry, and lately has been hard to conceal. During this time I am beginning to recognize how to live daily with this problem. I hope to share more about this as the days go by. This evening my son and I arrived at a Super 8 motel in the frozen north country. Snow on the ground and 22 degrees as we ran from the Steak & Shake and then from the car to the hotel.